Engaged?  This is the most exciting time for you and your fiancé, but that initial thrill of engagement and planning can sometimes put unrealistic visions into our heads. How to make it all come together is quite a challenge for the “first-timer.”  I have had brides contact me recently, unsure of what a planner can really do for them and often insisting that their moms have tons of free time and will be with them every step of the way. All that is great! It’s definitely awesome to have your mom largely involved in the planning process and on the big day. She should be after all, she’s your Mom! And she’s only been waiting for this day…well probably longer than you have, right?

Precisely my point here! She’s your Mom and she already plays a HUGE role in your wedding day. There is no reason you should put her in charge of all the planning or coordinating the details, especially for the day of. (Psst, now if your mom is a planner – more power to you but I would guarantee that SHE hired a coordinator, lol)

Are you wondering why I stress the importance of this? If so, here are three reasons for you!

1. She’s emotionally (& financially) attached. Ever heard of a momzilla? Sounds made-up, right? Wrong! She’s real and she could just be YOUR mom one day (trust me; even the calmest Mom’s have it in them on wedding weekend!) Remember when I said your mom may have been waiting for this day longer than you have?  She has a vision in her mind (and MY Mother had a TOTALLY different vision of MY big day!!!) That’s just another reason for her attachment to grow and sometimes interfere, which can have a huge impact on how your day plays out. A planner is typically a neutral third party, there to help smooth things over, help you make the best decision and play devil’s advocate when you need one the most (and at times, help you PUSH to get what YOU want!)
2. She Needs/Wants to Enjoy the Day Too. This goes almost without saying. “Don’t forget the person that is helping you with everything is also attending your wedding and not everyone wants to be running around making sure everything’s perfect, they want to be able to enjoy the wedding and party as well.” Couldn’t have said it better myself, so please take note and remember that your mom might actually want to…ENJOY your day with you! So let her, and best of all let her relax!
3. She Just Won’t Think of Everything. If your mom isn’t a wedding planner, this might not be the best time for her to learn on your big day. If she is, well you should still check with her to see if she wants to be in charge of everything, or anything for that matter (see number 2). For most girls, however, your mom is not a planner and therefore may not think of every single detail that needs to be done for that SPECIAL day. Planners put a lot of time and effort mapping out a schedule for your day, sometimes down to the minute by minute details. If you have seen a planner’s schedule, shoot me an email and I can show you what I mean!

Bottom line, if you’re looking for someone to help plan your big day, Mother’s are good option but a professional planner may just be the way to go. Your mom should play just as big a role in your wedding day as you would like! And I know depending on money, it may not be your choice, but when push comes to shove remember that it’s your day! Mom will love you no matter what…and nine times out of ten, as long as she can share the day WITH you, I think she’ll be more than happy (AND SO WILL YOU!)

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